A couple of weeks ago, I started listening to a cover of "No Cars Go" by Maxence Cyrin, which showed up in a random "discover" playlist on Spotify. I distinctly remember washing my car, getting to the end of the song, and having to start the song over. I then remember days later going for a trail run and starting to get rained on, with the air cooling and this song coming on. This was handily the highlight of that run.

I didn't think much of it. It was just a good song; really well done (I'm a mechanical engineer, not a sound engineer; no clue what made it "well done"). Apparently my brother, studying music, had used this song for a study at some point, so someone who knew what "well done" was also assigned it some value (that's 2 data points for this engineer; getting closer to being objectively good).

Fast forward to June 6th, I lost my wife, Carli to a hit-and-run at a crosswalk on the local trail. The driver, Mantavious McMorris, is charged with hit-and-run with death, reckless homicide, habitual offender causing death when license has been suspended, canceled, or revoked, and driving under suspension (his third offense).

Naturally, I've been in an emotional state, and I've been working to set up a memorial ride in her honor. During all the preparations and life in general, this song has come on and been a real tear-jerker. One of those "driving ahead, staring through tears, thank-God-for my dark window tint" songs, if there was such a thing. It's become her song, at least to me, but just based on sound alone.

But Max's version is instrumental; no lyrics. The only ties to "lyrics" with Max's version is the title itself, "No Cars Go". Obviously, with Carli's death, this wasn't the case. The one car that shouldn't have gone did. This irony turned what was simply a good tribute song for Carli into something more meaningful.

Having been a pretty big Arcade Fire fan years ago, I'd heard the song a thousand times. During my latest sleepless night, I decided to look up the full lyrics (below). I'm guessing the song is about heaven, the afterlife, or something along those lines. Fitting for Carli. But as I read through, I was almost startled by the line "between the click of the light and the start of the dream". The intersection where she was hit had a stoplight installed over the last few years, which was run by the man that killed Carli. For all of those who loved her, after that "click of the light", this whole weird dream in the wake of her death has started.

Thanks so much. Stay safe.
Ryan

‘No Cars Go,’ Arcade Fire

We know a place where no planes go
We know a place where no ships go

Hey!
No cars go
Hey!
No cars go
Where we know

We know a place no spaceships go
We know a place where no subs go

Hey!
No cars go
Hey!
No cars go
Where we know

Hey!

Hey!

No go!

Hey!
Us kids know
Hey!
No cars go
Where we know

Between the click of the light and the start of the dream
Between the click of the light and the start of the dream
Between the click of the light and the start of the dream
Between the click of the light and the start of the dream

I don't want any pushing, and I don't want any shoving
We're gonna do this in an orderly manner
Women and children!
Women and children!

Women and children, let's go!

Old folks, let's go!

Babies needing cribs, let's go!